My Top 5 (Actually 6) House-Hunting Tips

I’m in.

The house we lived in at the time was a small two bedroom rambler with 1 bathroom on the main level and one in the basement. While we had done some really sweet renovations to make the space work better for us, as our kids grew, we found ourselves bursting at the seams, tripping over things we used everyday, and squeezing into a one-sink bathroom- every morning and every night. It was getting old.

And I really, really wanted a fixer-upper type house. One that others might glance over, but I knew I could make into a beautiful home. I had a list of all my dream home wishes, and my husband and I both loved ramblers. Solid, cozy ramblers. We had a plan.

But then there’s that impatience thing. I started “just looking” and houses started popping into my inbox. And I grew more and more impatient with our current house. I started micro-focusing on ” a house with more than one bathroom sink and a more square footage”. And gradually, I lost sight of my “dream house wish list”. Which left the door wide open to all kinds of discernment mistakes.

Of course there were a couple of criteria that stuck out in our search- I really wanted a fireplace, and it had to have a decent yard. But when we met a real estate agent at a showing of a true fixer-upper, who discouraged us from that particular behemoth- out of our price range anyway- and suggested she show us 10ish not-so- overwhelming houses in our price range, it seemed logical.

She sent over a list of 10 houses, and we were to pick 5 to go look at. Still logical. We looked at 5 and didn’t like any of them. She encouraged us to look at one particular house that didn’t make our top 5. We said no. She called to let us know that the price of that house just dropped.

Ok, it’s close by. We’ll just look.

Eohhhh- it’s got a butlers pantry. I like love a butlers pantry. And space. And a 1:1 person/bathroom sink ratio. And a fireplace. And square footage. And granite countertops as a bonus. Still, we said no. It just didn’t feel like “it”.

But that Butlers Pantry.

She called again to “just let us know the price dropped again, and the seller was pretty motivated to unload, but at this new price it wouldn’t last long on the market”.

Hmmm. That butlers pantry and those sinks. And we could be out of here like, soon. And she says we can afford it. But the yard has no privacy or view that we want. The countertops were black and I’ve always wanted white. The living space was awkward, and the 2 story front entry was built more to impress rather than welcome, and looked directly on to the bedroom doors. And it was definitely not a rambler. Two stories plus an unfinished basement, lots of stairs and steep roof pitches. Not super solid construction, not cozy.

But…that butlers pantry and all those sinks.

At the closing, our lender congratulated us on finding our forever dream home.

Huh? Not really.

But I do very clearly recall something the previous owner said to us at the closing. She smiled and congratulated us and very peacefully said, “It’s a good house”.

We moved in the middle of winter in Minnesota- spending my daughters 10th birthday driving around in our van because we had to be out of the house for a showing, schlepping stuff into the storage truck in the middle of a snowstorm, during project prep for the 3rd grade science fair. It was dizzying fast and it was stressful.

And while we’ve put a lot into the house over the past few years, there is still a lot to be done. The butlers pantry? We stocked it with all the fancy stuff I had imagined I’d use, but I soon discovered that I don’t really….buttle. We typically don’t use the room on the other end of it for dining, and it’s dark in there, not all sunny and glassy and bright.

So it sounds like I regret this move?

I don’t. It has been a good investment. And I have been delighted by things I didn’t expect and wasn’t necessarily looking for: a big sunny corner kitchen sink with views to lovely farm fields, amazing sunset views, a jetted tub (yes- I use it), lots of sun, and great neighbors (mostly : ) The fireplace has been wonderful and thoroughly enjoyed, and the butlers pantry is a coffee bar and a really fun space for art and experimentation. Our family was placed in the right spot to bloom.

And it’s been an important process of learning; learning to sit back and be thoughtful about what I want. So I came up with a list of do’s and don’ts should I go through it again:

• I won’t get sucked in by the butlers pantry or let my eyes get glazed over by details I might not use.
• I won’t let anyone else tell me what the expenses are- I’ll do my own research in terms of expenses and maintenance cost. (Surprise. It’s not “about the same as your old house since everything is so much more efficient in the new one”.)
• I won’t run from something, instead toward something. I’ll consider what stage of life I’m at and what matters now and what might matter over the next few years.
• I’ll have a budget specifically to get the house set up and make it function for our family if it doesn’t already.
• I’ll have a list of dream home characteristics and keep it in my pocket when looking.
• And….wait for it….

Wait for it.

Sometimes it just takes longer than you think it will or want it to. Wait, and then be prepared to move fast when the opportunity does arise. Of course, life always throws curves at you and you’ll never make a perfect decision. Sometimes you really don’t know what you like, and you will have to make some compromises.

And even if you think you have found your “forever dream home”, there will be surprises. Even if you went through every room and imagined how you would use it, some things just won’t go as planned. You have to live there awhile to know how you will really use the space, what works and what doesn’t, how much light there is in what room at what time of the day. So, once you’re in, give it some time. A few months. See how the house functions for you and how you use the space. And don’t rush into painting and a big remodeling project unless you are equipped with a full on plan and a budget. But don’t put it off too long, either. Put money in when you can to enjoy your home now, not just the last couple months you’re in the house and it’s back on the market.

Mostly, enjoy all the gifts that your home is.

It is a “good house”. Still.

Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.

-Epicurus